Board To Death

If I were head of Milton-Bradley, and someone came up to me and said, "How about we make a game where kids launch fucking spiders at one another?", I wouldn't only give that person a raise on the spot, I would even make them my right hand man, because holy shit is that a hilarious idea. Beware The Spider is a board game produced by Milton-Bradley in 1980, though I could find no further information on the designer or the artist, and the playing time supposedly only runs for a mere 10 minutes, which makes it a perfect game for young kids (hence the age range they suggest on the box) to just while away an hour with on a boring rainy afternoon. Of course, this isn't the 90s anymore and kids have cell phones now for some reason, so. Anyway, the game takes 2 C-cell batteries to run, and the plot essentially goes like this: The plastic game base has a silver conductive web on which various plastic critters are placed. A felt spider is situated menacingly next to the web in i...

Operation is a sick, sick game. We gather our children around a man on a table and we tell them to pull things out of him with tweezers, things he likely still needs , things that aren't really the problem with his health. Think of like this, the healthcare system in the US is so poor, so looked down upon, so laughably bad, that we made surgery into a fucking board game. Operation was one of those games I never actually owned, but I did play it from time to time whether at after school functions or friends houses. The prototype was invented in 1964 by John Spinello, a University of Illinois Industrial Design student at the time of its creation. He later sold the rights to it to our good friend Marvin Glass for a measly (well by todays standards I suppose) 500 dollars and the promise of a job upon graduation, a promise which Glass did not uphold. I think it's safe to say at this point, given his iron grip on the industry and his rather piss poor behavior - whether it's steal...